Another Social Issues paper. This time on the rise of violence in schools.
The Wrath of Modernity:
A Call to Arms Against the Temptation and Misguidance of Modern Society
It can be said that violence in schools has increased overtime, specifically gun-related violence. Of course, a lot can be said about that, as well. Guns, for a period of time, and still to a degree today, are much more accessible and much greater in number. Violence is prevalent in movies, TV shows, and video games, but more importantly, it is fed to us everyday by the media, and we have become jaded to it. Most importantly, when was the last time a 13, 14, 15, 18 year old son was able to honestly confide in his parents? The same question can be posed for daughters, but like the rates of violence associated with them, the results are less staggering. As a society, we are closer to each other than ever before, in terms of both communication and in terms of physical space, but the opposite is true with families. Most families of today are plagued by technology, work and prevailing self-interest, and this is our modern downfall.
It is clear that this issue deals vastly more with the young male population than the female demographic, and why shouldn’t it? Women, more often than not, have multiple persons with whom to confide in, men only rarely do. Men are taught from a young age to show nothing, no pain, no mercy, no emotion and certainly no weakness; for the majority of males, confiding is just that, a sign of weakness. This has always driven a wedge between men and deep connections, but now that the familial unit is suffering a rupture in many cases, this is becoming a malignant problem. If a son had a trouble, his friends could help him. If there was not a friend to turn to, his father could often deal out a sage-like tarot of advice or show him the merits of giving no quarter in the ring, but these rituals, this systemic turning to the father for council is becoming archaic.
Modernity is unleashing its hammer of judgment this tradition, and it is doing so with more prongs than it seems we can combat. Alcoholism is a problem as old as the urban city, but it can be cited that many parents of violent offspring have exhibited such behaviors. Modern society has ruled that any form of vengeance unleashed upon a child is a practice evil enough to warrant a condemnation to Dante’s Inferno, and such a ruling can turn sufferers of these punishments into vindictive, disillusioned and untrusting despots. There are those, though, who suffer invisibly; those whose fate has fallen through the cracks. With the wedge of technology and individual responsibility already driving apart a family, with no friends to turn to and no parents to confide in, a child can be left alone; alone to brood, alone to suffer, alone to conspire against, alone to turn. With no one to attend to a child’s emotional and mental needs, such a vulnerable and malleable mind could conclude that violence is the verdict that must be judged upon the objects of his hate.
This is not always the case. To find violence to be the answer, a particular mixture must occur in the laboratory of mentality. If sadness is the ultimate power, suicide can be what is chosen for one’s course of action; if rebelliousness is what one desires, drugs may be what are turned to; if disillusionment is most prevalent, silent brooding, introspection and poetry could be the result; but if anger, hate and rage are the controlling monarchs, violence can be the ultimatum given.
The answer to why there has been such a drastic increase in school youth violence is not a black and white one. Everything from video games to the media has been singly blamed, but reality is more sobering than such a simple prospect as these. In the end, we are to blame. We will grow up. We will start families. We will have children, and although their ultimate actions are theirs, the parents are the greatest influences on a child’s being. It is the duty of parents to model the proper discourse to their children, or they could fall by the wayside, as many have.
Take all things in moderation. Look out for your fellow man and family. Hold not, a grudge. Talk. Parenting is complicated, and it is surely never perfect, optimal or predictable, but your greatest tool is always sensibility. If you must work until all hours of the night, tell your kids often enough that what your are doing is for the best, that they can talk to you if they really have to, and that they are still important to you. If your days become monotonous or hang heavy with the burden of stagnation, despair or weariness, strengthen your will and do no succumb to the temptation of alcohol or television and technology, for your habits are passed to your children. As excruciatingly difficult as it is for a father and a son, talk to your children. Establish common grounds, elevate beyond small talk and never sever these connections, for they are the most important for a child.
Believe me, I’m 17 and my dad is my best friend.
Resist modernity and think for oneself, or it will destroy us all.
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Sunday, December 5, 2010
Sore Ga Ai Deshou
Our Social Issues class was assigned a three week long "Marraige Project". For this, we had to marry an imaginary person or someone in class. I picked the former. My devious choice: "http://www.kawapaper.com/d/5148-2/Kawapaper_Clannad_0000038_1920x1200.jpg" One portion of it was a (realistic) narrative of your wedding day. On a realism scale of 1 to 10, mine ranks about a 3, but that's not important. Here's what I produced. Note: this happens "in the future" so no one's a high school student here. Other Note: NO EDITING FTW!
Solar beams burned through the windows like the cascades of a waterfall, continuously and powerfully. Today was the day.
Curious, the unfamiliarity, but novelty of my room. The same bed that was my home in high school and over summers, the vibrant sunbeam paint, the various baubles and trinkets decorating my desks, it all seemed so new, yet so comfortably mine. I mused over the drinking bird, the autonomous movement of my gyroscopic toy, the rising and falling of the mysterious goo in my lava lamp, as they all seemed to call to me with rejuvenated voices. Even the sun’s rays cast light of a different hue. But there would be time for existential discussions and monologues with the later.
I slid down the banister with expertise rivaling General Zaroff. If there had been a bronze statue of Aphrodite standing in my father’s house, it surely would have received a playful slap on its backside. My body had become a tempesting mix of anxiety, excitement and jubilation, and the product potion was shaping up to be volatile with gayness.
Breakfast of Champions in a comfy robe fit to be worn by the kings of Babylon. The griddle sizzled and delicious aromas permeated the room in anticipation of an egg sandwich. But such savory scents had not gone unnoticed. From deep within the bowels of the enormous fortress of a home, a beast stirred. I quickly devoured the Breakfast of Champions, more hungry than afraid. Heralded by a kingly fanfare, the neighing of a liege of stallions, the howling and roaring of exotic beasts and a thunderous zephyr fowl enough to curdle the juices on one’s eyeballs, my father entered the kitchen.
“Morning” The Butler family was quite…confident… in their physical demeanor. Legend has it that Morgan I actually dueled Mr. Webster to have the word “self-conscious” removed from their dictionary.
“Dad, put some pants on”
“Someday, prodigal son, you will learn to feel the breeze between your knees”
“You’re naked” I said, plainly.
“The wearing of clothes is a false construct perpetrated by the unfounded society we perceive as a necessity of our modern reality”
“Quit using Nihilism as an excuse not to wear pants”
“You’re lucky I did my laundry last night” He promptly exited the room more cantankerously than Grampa Joad.
The remainder of my morning rituals passed uneventfully, leaving plenty of time for the ridiculousness that would inevitably ensue.
It did not make me wait.
The earth shook and the skies darkened, heralding the entrance of another – my greatest and most powerful enemy. I equipped my saber and took to the out doors. A whirling vortex of fat clouds swirled over my realm, engulfing everything passing its event horizon. From its center, a single figure fell, diving with sword drawn, at me.
“En garde!” Niko lashed out with his blade. I blocked and quickly leapt back as he crashed on to my lawn. A small crater, now bereft of grass and green, formed beneath his feet.
“I am not so helpless” He stood up to his full towering height of 5’ 10’’. I took a quick jab at his sword arm, causing him to recoil, averting my attack. He responded with a volley of blows, advancing aggressively. Tightening my focus, I held my defensive stance.
“But a shield alone cannot defeat a blade” He finished his quote with a clumsy flourish, ending his advance.
“You’d be surprised” Niko recommenced his barrage, precise and probing strikes, testing for an invisible weakness in my defensive cone.
The blows became monotonous, simple movements, badgering me to retaliate, to bring the fight a second side, to show my wrath. He succeeded. I turned my block in to a mocking riposte, easily bypassing his crude defenses, further weakened by his complacency. The tip sliced across his forearm, clearly delineating contract before I retreated back in to a loose stance, ready to meet him should he wish to continue.
“Nice! I’m glad I wasn’t tuxedo clad”
“You’d be paying for it, too”
“Cheap bastard”
“Sticks and stones, doctor. Sticks and stones”
“How about a saber?
“En garde!”
We continued our duel for a period, matches going both ways. The lawn, despite its expanse was occupied heavily by both cars and people, who, over time, began to congregate around us, calmly looking on. It was not difficult, however, to see their agitation. Relatives of my father’s side glared daggers at me, unappreciative of my rambunctious behavior; indifferent of myself, they would say. Uninhibited by their judgments, Niko and I danced our duel about the yard, separating here and there, moving across mediums and obstacles, gleefully enjoying the mutual intensity of the fray, until a third blade entered.
From behind the wall of foliage and vehicles, from beyond the wall of disillusioning spectators, from within the screaming, dark abyss of the street, a beacon of light penetrated the darkened skies in a swirling vortex of righteousness and erupted a shockwave of consecrating holy energy, incinerating evil in its wake of its righteous fire and vindicating the pure with an infusion of atoning, penitent glory. Paladin of the Light, Grand Crusader of the Eternal Verdict, Vindicator of the Argent Crusader and Squire to Lord Grayson Shadowbreaker, Lord Gregor advanced, saber in hand, wings of shining white purity spread, and strong in his conviction.
“Armor clad? This is hardly fair” Niko protested.
“The Battle-plate of the Lightbringer was hard earned in the fires of combat. What have you done to earn such?”
“Oh, I didn’t say I didn’t have any armor, I just said its unfair for you to be the only one” As he finished, Niko was overtaken by a wispy veil of darkness, dissipating to reveal a posh Victorian getup, ornamented by ornate tails, frills and rich hues of red, purple, gold and blue.
“Hardly defensive”
“Nobility finds no need to protect from flaccid strikes”
“Arrogance finds no quarter from the Hammer of Justice”
“And I am finding that I have come drastically under-prepared in the attire department” I interjected.
“Way to ruin the moment”
“Such are my skills” I said as I raised my sword. Even the distant onlookers seemed to temporarily relent, as if expecting greatness.
“Defend yourselves!” Lord Gregor arced his saber at Niko, who easily avoided the ostentatious offense. I lunged, stabbing at the challenger. He parried and retreated. The ebbs and flows of the battle came cyclically, as one would be singled, then another, then the third, and then returning to the first. At points one would falter, the two would strike viciously and advance vigorously, forcing the other to defend wildly until one of the attackers developed duplicitous tendencies. The battle raged like a tempest on the warm seas, several times only narrowly avoiding collateral damage, until our arms grew heavy with strain, our hands drenched in focus and our hearts exhausted by hunger.
The sun reined on high when we retreated to my fortress of bachloritude, the scowling faces long retired, seeing the fruitlessness of their efforts.
“Your eggs are mine” Lord Gregor decreed as he commandeered the entirety of my egg supply.
“Going, no doubt, to a noble cause, oh demigod of justice?” I retorted.
“There exists not, a cause so holy as my stomach!” the idol of righteousness zealously proclaimed.
“Morgan, I’m stealing your hot pockets”
“And I’ll eat what?”
“Photosynthesize some energy”
“As attractive as self-manufactured sugar sounds, I think I’ll go with a sandwich”
We nommed in silence, mine filled with contemplation. Self-reflection and introspection weren’t uncommon – especially under circumstances orbiting emotion – and this moment wasn’t an exception; and yet I found myself unable to truly contemplate my thoughts in a concise manner. A fog had been laid over my perceptions and I found closure, clarity and enlightenment a holy grail.
I couldn’t even accurately pinpoint what was bothering me. I love her. I know I love her. That pure confusion, that sense of concern without reason, is that what they call true anxiety? I had never felt it before. I couldn’t even say that I didn’t like it
“Doctor! We have things to do!” Niko snapped me out of my self-induced trance.
“Well, of course, doctor. How could you have forgotten?”
“I don’t know! It just sort of happened”
“That’s unfortunate”
“Yes”
“Kitty mew!”
“Doctor, there’s no time for that!”
“Mew!”
“Doctor, you’re not a kitty!”
“Mew!”
“Fine! You’re a kitty! But we have to go!”
“Mew!”
With the speed and force of great typhoon, our triad exited my father’s opulent manor, proceeding to stroll coolly to my motor vehicle. Within minutes we were scuttling and dancing about my mother’s yard in a fashion akin to an inebriated crab and a cantankerous Maracas musician, respectively. Lord Gregor opted to look on in amusement and apprehension at our eccentric ritual.
After the entering of my mother and other Olivers, and a sufficient amount of ridiculousness had occurred, we congregated in the driveway – a scene reminiscent of the Joad’s truck-side council. We exchanged salutations before entering in to serious logistical conversation; finalizing taskmastering duties and the itinerary, and exchanging pertinent meteorological information, punctuated by humorous interjections vanguarded by Uncle Ted.
What was setup the day before was minimal. After we separated, we went to work feverishly setting up tables, chairs, lanterns, and various other knick-knacks and trinkets. Periodically our work force was augmented, as Butlers arrived and aided in our campaign.
The carpooling was carefully planned out, allowing many of the cars that would’ve been present to remain behind in my father’s horse pasture (of course, horses hadn’t inhabited the space in years), and cares that were brought had parking spaces offered to them by my mother’s neighbors.
The driveway and courtyard had been converted to a dance floor, with music systems placed on the roof over head. Beside the house, an empty buffet table was prepared to receive food, with tables set up between it and the tree line.
The tables each were given a table cloth of either white or warm purple, a saucer-like bowl with a single blossom floating in water, and a candle surrounded by a purple veil of tissue paper akin to that of a Chinese lantern.
My mother’s yard – bordered by the road, a field, the house and a forest – kept a line of trees and brush between it and the road and field. The expanse, punctuated by the tallest of trees, comfortably fit the rows of chairs and was naturally divided in to sections, making arrangement a simple process.
The Butler and Oliver families were both skilled hosts of grandiose celebrations and rambunctious shindigs, and prided themselves in the simultaneous sophisticated and casual nature of the events.
When our tasks were finished, the sun was greeting the tree line.
“5:30” Lord Gregor said. We were seated at one of the tables. The small-petaled flower listed calmly about the pool, and our eyes followed it intently. Like a curious sprite, it would inspect a shore, then, perhaps, swim about before finding another location of water’s edge. The ceremony was scheduled for 7:00. The work had done well to distract my thoughts, and now I was intent on the floating flower doing the same.
“You should probably take a shower or something, Morgan” I looked up at Niko lazily.
“I suppose that’s a good idea”
“We’ll handle processes out here” Lord Gregor added.
“Thanks” Removing the tuxedo and various other prepared underclothings, I found my way to the communal shower of my mother’s domicile. Without the arbitrary actions of the blossom or the attention demanding labor, I was once again alone with my thoughts and the water, however cleansing it was to my body, couldn’t waver the confusing mental fog that plagued my mind. Whether I was happy or sad, I couldn’t even answer a question as simple as that.
Nearing the end of my Nacireman ritual, I realized the words, the melody I had been singing without even consciously producing it.
“Yasashisa wa tokidoki zankoku dakara. Motomeru hodo kotae wo miushinau” Because kindness can be cruel sometimes. I lose sight of the answer the more I search for it. The words had never meant so much to me before. I majored in Japanese language to decipher the songs I had been listening to since before high school, but never had I truly understood them, not implicitly, not truly.
“Ameagari no machi niji ga mieru nara Ima arukidasou nani ka ga hajimaru.” If you see the rainbow in the town after the rain let’s start walking, something is about to begin. It all fit. Everything had led up to this. My high school obsession, the studies at Madison, the rotations in Japan, the fateful meeting; it had all lead up to this.
“Kimi ga iru kara asu ga aru kara” Because I have you, because I have tomorrow. The words were spilling out, uncontrollable with passion. I wanted so terribly it tore at my very being.
“Hitorikiri ja ikite yukenai kara” Because I can’t live on all alone. She was the answer. The fog, in the blink of an eye, with the note of the song, it vanished and left only her face.
“Konna ni chikaku ni kanjiru” I feel you so close by me. All that was left was absolute conviction. Pure unwavering conviction.
“Sore Ga Ai Deshou” I guess that’s love.
The tux felt quite snazzy and posh. The coat, undershirt and pants were all pure white, with a sky-blue tie and vest. After applying footwear, I ventured out in to the backyard. I clipped a single purple blossom from its stem, taping closed the end with a nip of Scotch (tape, not liquor) and placed the adornment in my breast pocket, securing it with a piece of fabric tape. My mother kept a bed of flowers when it suited her, and she went almost over the top when she heard of our engagement. She had been the queen of budget weddings, and gave me quite a number of pro tips. Tape was my favorite and using only her flowers for the wedding was a close second.
Lord Radi and Lord Gregor came around the yard, now also suit-clad. “No shoulder plates, Lord Gregor?”
“It wouldn’t fit the color scheme, Lord Erikshielder”
“I’m glad you’re so thoughtful”
“I just don’t want to ruin my good clothing, so I decided to put on this shabby stuff” Lord Radi interjected.
“Then I’m glad you’re so selfish”
“Any time”
The minutes passed quickly. Only small things were left to be done, but the way people moved, one would think the meticulous details were of critical importance. It was 6:30, but with nothing to truly do, I poised myself at the head of the aisle, talking casually with Lord Radi, Lord Gregor and the bishop. I threw some change at him and the bishop of Waukesha’s local Church of Latter-day Saints offered to enact the ceremony. It helped that he was the father of two friends I had maintained contact with since high school. Despite his Doctorate in mathematics and engineering, Father Cuzner was a humble man, but was by no means shy. His conversation was as enjoyable as any, and didn’t carry the air of an unapproachable, as many religious leaders do.
At one point, the caravan carrying Tomoyo’s party arrived, unloading their troupe behind the house, outside of my view. I smiled at the thoughts, as the emptied cars took their places on the far property.
Lord Radi attempted a few exceedingly ridiculous distractions I could half make out in my peripheral for to return me to reality, causing both the bishop and Lord Gregor to laugh. I pretended not to notice, and continued to stare off where Tomoyo would have been.
“Oh no! He’s been possessed! We need an exorcism!”
“I don’t do those anymore. Not after the incident…” the bishop’s eyes darkened, as if remembering some terrible horror that occurred.
“I got this” Lord Gregor summoned his hammer in a blinding flash of light. “By the Light! Cleanse this soul!” Lord Gregor went through a small routine of theatrics, dramatically doing nothing. “Darn, and I was so sure that was going to work”
The chairs began filling. Slowly at first, then at a quicker pace as people followed the leader. Nagisa Furukawa, the Fujibayashi twins and Lord Timothy joined our conversational group as well. Soon, though, the language barrier became too much of an inconvenience, as I led a sundering of the group, leaving Gregor, Timothy, Niko and Mr. Cuzner to their own devices, opting to speak with the friends I had cultivated while courting Tomoyo in Japan. The moon peeked over the horizon and the sun was offering only scars of light when we moved in to formation.
From the side, Uncle Ted, a locally renowned piano player, began the ceremonial chorus, dancing his appendages about a portable electric piano my father had purchased a few years ago sounding on the organ setting.
Her father, Sausuke-san, heralded her presence like the creeping dawn heralds the sunrise. Like a beautiful blossom, she stood, moon to her back; an aura of penumbral lunar radiance cast around her like a halo. Her vibrant silvery-gray hair cascaded around her petit frame like gently falling rain about a masterful statue. A small blue flower was held at the corner of her face, clinging near her ear, where it accented the deep ocean blue of her eyes.
Clad in a traditional white kimono adorned with intricate stitchings of cranes and flowers, she floated up the aisle as if the only thing keeping her from ascending infinitely was her father’s hand. After ushering her to the mark, Sakagami-san gave a respectful bow to his daughter and turned to me. I presented him with a deep, grateful bow, to which he returned before taking his place next to his wife.
The bishop cleared his throat softly. “We are gathered here today to celebrate the uniting of this respectable young lady and this rascal, Tomoyo Sakagami and Morgan Butler IV. If they would now present vows.”
My tuxedo should’ve been stained red. My heart full to bursting at that point. I hadn’t been so nervous to speak since my 2010 Acadec speech, and even that couldn’t compare. Composing myself, I offered my hand and locked eyes with her. Everything else was fading away. It didn’t matter. It couldn’t have in that moment. It was like standing in a forest clearing with naught but the shining light of the moon and the rhythmic dancing of fireflies, miles away from the world, miles away from the people, miles away from everything. All who was before me, all who could hear my voice was her.
“I’ve been searching for quite some time
For that special one who would be mine
Long I’ve tread on this road of life
Wondering if I wasn’t doing something right
But then in you came
And with you it all changed
You awoke this heart
Gave me a new start
But now its my turn
I’m going to show you now
I’ve never going to let you go
Forever I’m going to know
Forever between us I will feel that spark
Until the light fades out
Until the room grows dark
Until the moon shines down
Even after the years have painted their scorns on our days
I’ll still see the loving glow on your face
And like every Disney you see
My love for you will still shine free
For you I’d climb a mountain
For you I’d swim the seas
I’m asking you to by soul’s companion
And spend your life with me”
Not once did she allow herself to lose her visual grip, even as her eyes grew lustrous with tears. But at once it was too much. She looked down, closing her eyes tightly, shaking her head and donning an amused smile.
“Looks like we had the same idea” she stated as she returned her gaze to mine.
“Like the sun’s light on the moon, you have shone your light on me
You’ve lit up my life in a darkening sea
I don’t ever want to lose this light
Forever I want it in my life
It not for the sex and its not for the beauty
I never want to lose your unconditional loyalty
Like a light in the night I’ll never waver or doubt
That, to me, you’ll be coming home on an express route
And in return to you I’ll guarantee
Eternal love, support and fidelity
No matter the trial or tribulation
By you, I’ll ardently stand
And with mutual conviction
We’ll conquer all that seeks our end
In to the latter years of our life
As the sun sets forever
Despite life troubles and sadness
We’ll walk in to the horizon together”
I drew the same smile she had before she gave her vow.
“True Companion?” I asked
“No one but Cohn” All we could do was stand and stare at each other. She never ceases to be the person I met all those years ago. Rapier wit, assertive dominance, and a peculiar skill for romance.
“And now for the rings”
My little cousin Carolyn gave Tomoyo her band and Carolyn’s older brother, Brady gave me mine. The two grade-schoolers then ran back to their parents, clearly embarrassed beyond measurement. I was immediately given a highly sassy glare as Tomoyo stuck out her hand, demanding my hand. I raised my hand, preparing to place it on hers when she went to snatch it. I quickly pulled it back, combing my hair with my fingers and giving her look of grave satisfaction. She turned her hand in to a fist and belted a bone busting blow to my bicep and reoffered her palm. I submissively agreed, worrying for my ribs.
Her hands were smooth and soft; gracefully manipulating my fingers in to a deadly finger hold, prepared to sever my hand from my body should I try another one of my little zings. She slid the ring on peacefully, releasing me from her grasp, but I was not going to fall for her plan. I quickly turned my hand over and sojourned her right with mine. She raised her eyebrow mischievously, clearly ready with a backup plan. Again, she manipulated my inarticulate phalanges and instigated a thumb war. I gave a cute sigh, raised my eyebrow and looked at her with stern amusement at her audacity. She returned a victorious smile and allowed me control of her hand. I equipped her with the second half of the gold-woven band.
“Starcaller Tomoyo Sakagami, do you take this man, Moonweaver Morgan Butler IV, to be your husband for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, to love and to hold until death do you part?”
“I do”
“Skycaptain Morgan Butler IV, do you take this woman, Dread Falconer Tomoyo Sakagami, to be your wife for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, to love and to hold until death do you part?”
“I do”
Father Cuzner closed his book and looked expectantly at the two of us.
“Well, kiss her. What are you waiting for?”
Immediately I pulled the angel in to a deep embrace and pressed my lips on to hers. Only for a few seconds could I hear the applause. A thousand times before I had kissed her, but there was a novel quality of this kiss. Everything felt excitingly new. Special. Pure. The soft arms on my back, her fine hair titillating my forehead and eyelids, her slender form melting in a wonderful mutual embrace, her warm lips on mine. An angel had chosen me.
We parted enough to look at each other and traded warm expressions. Most of the seated attendees no longer were. We turned to face them, never losing the happiness on our faces as cameras flashed and people began to line up to shake hands and congratulate us.
After the swarm of people had passed and were now at work stacking up the chairs near the house to open up space for other activities. The moon now cast its approving gaze upon us from above the trees, joined by multitudes of hanging Maru Ball Japanese lanterns. The night passed quickly and in spurts. The dinner, around 8:00 was casual at best, already having given people the choice of eating at whatever point they chose. Still, we obliged to a dinner of family heads, honoring the tradition as best we could. Various activities occurred about the yard: Uncle Ted continued to play the piano, gladly rehearsing his vast repertoire for all who desired a jolly listen; a tossing of the Frisbee was now underway where the ceremony had taken place; dancing was abound at the front of the house; and Lord Radi was swindling everybody’s money after setting up an impromptu game of Texas Hold Em north east of the Frisbee game.
After the dinner Tomoyo and I changed in to semi-formal wear, prepared for physical activity and potential accidental spills, and proceeded to participate in the festivities. Well, except for Lord Radi’s monopoly on his victim’s wallets. This event was simply spectated.
“You know, we never finished that thumb war” Tomoyo looked my way.
“Promise not to break my finger?” I offered my hand.
“So long as you play fair” We stood up, understanding the severity of the situation. Atop the low-pitched roof of the house, we locked fists and began the ritual.
“1-2-3-4 I declare a thumb war! 5-6-7-8 TASTE THE FLAMES OF SULFURON!” Our declaration was simultaneous and ostentatiously bombastic. Instantly we delved in to the depths of a battle on a scale to rival the invasion of Troy. Though, instead of fighting for a woman, we fought for dominance in the realm of finger-related prowess. As we advanced back and forth, dancing about the roof, we had accumulated a small crowd of onlookers. In the blink of an eye, I was flung, spun and pinned to the ground under her weight. Tomoyo twisted my arm, freezing my thumb in regionalized pain. She immediately seized the opportunity and gripped my thumb like a vice. I leapt to my feet, spinning like a ballroom dancer and freed myself from both traps she had locked me in.
“Not bad, my beloved. But can you handle the LION’S BARRAGE!?” Her visage intensified as she began an intense thumb punches to which I quickly buckled beneath. Before she had even began, I was defeated. “362 of the 1000 attacks – an impressive feat”
“I will beat you one day”
“Not likely. I do have a heritage of powerful thumb warriors”
“But who says you’re immune to seductive tactics”
“I’d say it goes both ways”
Again we were in each others embrace.
“I love you, Tomoyo” Her eyes, blue as the sky, and twinkling with the same nebulous stars of the cosmos looked passionately in to mine. Her silvery gray hair, shining in the light of the moon, falling below her hips, caressed my embracing arms and her head rested beneath my chin.
Like the soft purr of a kitten she whispered, “I love you, too”
Solar beams burned through the windows like the cascades of a waterfall, continuously and powerfully. Today was the day.
Curious, the unfamiliarity, but novelty of my room. The same bed that was my home in high school and over summers, the vibrant sunbeam paint, the various baubles and trinkets decorating my desks, it all seemed so new, yet so comfortably mine. I mused over the drinking bird, the autonomous movement of my gyroscopic toy, the rising and falling of the mysterious goo in my lava lamp, as they all seemed to call to me with rejuvenated voices. Even the sun’s rays cast light of a different hue. But there would be time for existential discussions and monologues with the later.
I slid down the banister with expertise rivaling General Zaroff. If there had been a bronze statue of Aphrodite standing in my father’s house, it surely would have received a playful slap on its backside. My body had become a tempesting mix of anxiety, excitement and jubilation, and the product potion was shaping up to be volatile with gayness.
Breakfast of Champions in a comfy robe fit to be worn by the kings of Babylon. The griddle sizzled and delicious aromas permeated the room in anticipation of an egg sandwich. But such savory scents had not gone unnoticed. From deep within the bowels of the enormous fortress of a home, a beast stirred. I quickly devoured the Breakfast of Champions, more hungry than afraid. Heralded by a kingly fanfare, the neighing of a liege of stallions, the howling and roaring of exotic beasts and a thunderous zephyr fowl enough to curdle the juices on one’s eyeballs, my father entered the kitchen.
“Morning” The Butler family was quite…confident… in their physical demeanor. Legend has it that Morgan I actually dueled Mr. Webster to have the word “self-conscious” removed from their dictionary.
“Dad, put some pants on”
“Someday, prodigal son, you will learn to feel the breeze between your knees”
“You’re naked” I said, plainly.
“The wearing of clothes is a false construct perpetrated by the unfounded society we perceive as a necessity of our modern reality”
“Quit using Nihilism as an excuse not to wear pants”
“You’re lucky I did my laundry last night” He promptly exited the room more cantankerously than Grampa Joad.
The remainder of my morning rituals passed uneventfully, leaving plenty of time for the ridiculousness that would inevitably ensue.
It did not make me wait.
The earth shook and the skies darkened, heralding the entrance of another – my greatest and most powerful enemy. I equipped my saber and took to the out doors. A whirling vortex of fat clouds swirled over my realm, engulfing everything passing its event horizon. From its center, a single figure fell, diving with sword drawn, at me.
“En garde!” Niko lashed out with his blade. I blocked and quickly leapt back as he crashed on to my lawn. A small crater, now bereft of grass and green, formed beneath his feet.
“I am not so helpless” He stood up to his full towering height of 5’ 10’’. I took a quick jab at his sword arm, causing him to recoil, averting my attack. He responded with a volley of blows, advancing aggressively. Tightening my focus, I held my defensive stance.
“But a shield alone cannot defeat a blade” He finished his quote with a clumsy flourish, ending his advance.
“You’d be surprised” Niko recommenced his barrage, precise and probing strikes, testing for an invisible weakness in my defensive cone.
The blows became monotonous, simple movements, badgering me to retaliate, to bring the fight a second side, to show my wrath. He succeeded. I turned my block in to a mocking riposte, easily bypassing his crude defenses, further weakened by his complacency. The tip sliced across his forearm, clearly delineating contract before I retreated back in to a loose stance, ready to meet him should he wish to continue.
“Nice! I’m glad I wasn’t tuxedo clad”
“You’d be paying for it, too”
“Cheap bastard”
“Sticks and stones, doctor. Sticks and stones”
“How about a saber?
“En garde!”
We continued our duel for a period, matches going both ways. The lawn, despite its expanse was occupied heavily by both cars and people, who, over time, began to congregate around us, calmly looking on. It was not difficult, however, to see their agitation. Relatives of my father’s side glared daggers at me, unappreciative of my rambunctious behavior; indifferent of myself, they would say. Uninhibited by their judgments, Niko and I danced our duel about the yard, separating here and there, moving across mediums and obstacles, gleefully enjoying the mutual intensity of the fray, until a third blade entered.
From behind the wall of foliage and vehicles, from beyond the wall of disillusioning spectators, from within the screaming, dark abyss of the street, a beacon of light penetrated the darkened skies in a swirling vortex of righteousness and erupted a shockwave of consecrating holy energy, incinerating evil in its wake of its righteous fire and vindicating the pure with an infusion of atoning, penitent glory. Paladin of the Light, Grand Crusader of the Eternal Verdict, Vindicator of the Argent Crusader and Squire to Lord Grayson Shadowbreaker, Lord Gregor advanced, saber in hand, wings of shining white purity spread, and strong in his conviction.
“Armor clad? This is hardly fair” Niko protested.
“The Battle-plate of the Lightbringer was hard earned in the fires of combat. What have you done to earn such?”
“Oh, I didn’t say I didn’t have any armor, I just said its unfair for you to be the only one” As he finished, Niko was overtaken by a wispy veil of darkness, dissipating to reveal a posh Victorian getup, ornamented by ornate tails, frills and rich hues of red, purple, gold and blue.
“Hardly defensive”
“Nobility finds no need to protect from flaccid strikes”
“Arrogance finds no quarter from the Hammer of Justice”
“And I am finding that I have come drastically under-prepared in the attire department” I interjected.
“Way to ruin the moment”
“Such are my skills” I said as I raised my sword. Even the distant onlookers seemed to temporarily relent, as if expecting greatness.
“Defend yourselves!” Lord Gregor arced his saber at Niko, who easily avoided the ostentatious offense. I lunged, stabbing at the challenger. He parried and retreated. The ebbs and flows of the battle came cyclically, as one would be singled, then another, then the third, and then returning to the first. At points one would falter, the two would strike viciously and advance vigorously, forcing the other to defend wildly until one of the attackers developed duplicitous tendencies. The battle raged like a tempest on the warm seas, several times only narrowly avoiding collateral damage, until our arms grew heavy with strain, our hands drenched in focus and our hearts exhausted by hunger.
The sun reined on high when we retreated to my fortress of bachloritude, the scowling faces long retired, seeing the fruitlessness of their efforts.
“Your eggs are mine” Lord Gregor decreed as he commandeered the entirety of my egg supply.
“Going, no doubt, to a noble cause, oh demigod of justice?” I retorted.
“There exists not, a cause so holy as my stomach!” the idol of righteousness zealously proclaimed.
“Morgan, I’m stealing your hot pockets”
“And I’ll eat what?”
“Photosynthesize some energy”
“As attractive as self-manufactured sugar sounds, I think I’ll go with a sandwich”
We nommed in silence, mine filled with contemplation. Self-reflection and introspection weren’t uncommon – especially under circumstances orbiting emotion – and this moment wasn’t an exception; and yet I found myself unable to truly contemplate my thoughts in a concise manner. A fog had been laid over my perceptions and I found closure, clarity and enlightenment a holy grail.
I couldn’t even accurately pinpoint what was bothering me. I love her. I know I love her. That pure confusion, that sense of concern without reason, is that what they call true anxiety? I had never felt it before. I couldn’t even say that I didn’t like it
“Doctor! We have things to do!” Niko snapped me out of my self-induced trance.
“Well, of course, doctor. How could you have forgotten?”
“I don’t know! It just sort of happened”
“That’s unfortunate”
“Yes”
“Kitty mew!”
“Doctor, there’s no time for that!”
“Mew!”
“Doctor, you’re not a kitty!”
“Mew!”
“Fine! You’re a kitty! But we have to go!”
“Mew!”
With the speed and force of great typhoon, our triad exited my father’s opulent manor, proceeding to stroll coolly to my motor vehicle. Within minutes we were scuttling and dancing about my mother’s yard in a fashion akin to an inebriated crab and a cantankerous Maracas musician, respectively. Lord Gregor opted to look on in amusement and apprehension at our eccentric ritual.
After the entering of my mother and other Olivers, and a sufficient amount of ridiculousness had occurred, we congregated in the driveway – a scene reminiscent of the Joad’s truck-side council. We exchanged salutations before entering in to serious logistical conversation; finalizing taskmastering duties and the itinerary, and exchanging pertinent meteorological information, punctuated by humorous interjections vanguarded by Uncle Ted.
What was setup the day before was minimal. After we separated, we went to work feverishly setting up tables, chairs, lanterns, and various other knick-knacks and trinkets. Periodically our work force was augmented, as Butlers arrived and aided in our campaign.
The carpooling was carefully planned out, allowing many of the cars that would’ve been present to remain behind in my father’s horse pasture (of course, horses hadn’t inhabited the space in years), and cares that were brought had parking spaces offered to them by my mother’s neighbors.
The driveway and courtyard had been converted to a dance floor, with music systems placed on the roof over head. Beside the house, an empty buffet table was prepared to receive food, with tables set up between it and the tree line.
The tables each were given a table cloth of either white or warm purple, a saucer-like bowl with a single blossom floating in water, and a candle surrounded by a purple veil of tissue paper akin to that of a Chinese lantern.
My mother’s yard – bordered by the road, a field, the house and a forest – kept a line of trees and brush between it and the road and field. The expanse, punctuated by the tallest of trees, comfortably fit the rows of chairs and was naturally divided in to sections, making arrangement a simple process.
The Butler and Oliver families were both skilled hosts of grandiose celebrations and rambunctious shindigs, and prided themselves in the simultaneous sophisticated and casual nature of the events.
When our tasks were finished, the sun was greeting the tree line.
“5:30” Lord Gregor said. We were seated at one of the tables. The small-petaled flower listed calmly about the pool, and our eyes followed it intently. Like a curious sprite, it would inspect a shore, then, perhaps, swim about before finding another location of water’s edge. The ceremony was scheduled for 7:00. The work had done well to distract my thoughts, and now I was intent on the floating flower doing the same.
“You should probably take a shower or something, Morgan” I looked up at Niko lazily.
“I suppose that’s a good idea”
“We’ll handle processes out here” Lord Gregor added.
“Thanks” Removing the tuxedo and various other prepared underclothings, I found my way to the communal shower of my mother’s domicile. Without the arbitrary actions of the blossom or the attention demanding labor, I was once again alone with my thoughts and the water, however cleansing it was to my body, couldn’t waver the confusing mental fog that plagued my mind. Whether I was happy or sad, I couldn’t even answer a question as simple as that.
Nearing the end of my Nacireman ritual, I realized the words, the melody I had been singing without even consciously producing it.
“Yasashisa wa tokidoki zankoku dakara. Motomeru hodo kotae wo miushinau” Because kindness can be cruel sometimes. I lose sight of the answer the more I search for it. The words had never meant so much to me before. I majored in Japanese language to decipher the songs I had been listening to since before high school, but never had I truly understood them, not implicitly, not truly.
“Ameagari no machi niji ga mieru nara Ima arukidasou nani ka ga hajimaru.” If you see the rainbow in the town after the rain let’s start walking, something is about to begin. It all fit. Everything had led up to this. My high school obsession, the studies at Madison, the rotations in Japan, the fateful meeting; it had all lead up to this.
“Kimi ga iru kara asu ga aru kara” Because I have you, because I have tomorrow. The words were spilling out, uncontrollable with passion. I wanted so terribly it tore at my very being.
“Hitorikiri ja ikite yukenai kara” Because I can’t live on all alone. She was the answer. The fog, in the blink of an eye, with the note of the song, it vanished and left only her face.
“Konna ni chikaku ni kanjiru” I feel you so close by me. All that was left was absolute conviction. Pure unwavering conviction.
“Sore Ga Ai Deshou” I guess that’s love.
The tux felt quite snazzy and posh. The coat, undershirt and pants were all pure white, with a sky-blue tie and vest. After applying footwear, I ventured out in to the backyard. I clipped a single purple blossom from its stem, taping closed the end with a nip of Scotch (tape, not liquor) and placed the adornment in my breast pocket, securing it with a piece of fabric tape. My mother kept a bed of flowers when it suited her, and she went almost over the top when she heard of our engagement. She had been the queen of budget weddings, and gave me quite a number of pro tips. Tape was my favorite and using only her flowers for the wedding was a close second.
Lord Radi and Lord Gregor came around the yard, now also suit-clad. “No shoulder plates, Lord Gregor?”
“It wouldn’t fit the color scheme, Lord Erikshielder”
“I’m glad you’re so thoughtful”
“I just don’t want to ruin my good clothing, so I decided to put on this shabby stuff” Lord Radi interjected.
“Then I’m glad you’re so selfish”
“Any time”
The minutes passed quickly. Only small things were left to be done, but the way people moved, one would think the meticulous details were of critical importance. It was 6:30, but with nothing to truly do, I poised myself at the head of the aisle, talking casually with Lord Radi, Lord Gregor and the bishop. I threw some change at him and the bishop of Waukesha’s local Church of Latter-day Saints offered to enact the ceremony. It helped that he was the father of two friends I had maintained contact with since high school. Despite his Doctorate in mathematics and engineering, Father Cuzner was a humble man, but was by no means shy. His conversation was as enjoyable as any, and didn’t carry the air of an unapproachable, as many religious leaders do.
At one point, the caravan carrying Tomoyo’s party arrived, unloading their troupe behind the house, outside of my view. I smiled at the thoughts, as the emptied cars took their places on the far property.
Lord Radi attempted a few exceedingly ridiculous distractions I could half make out in my peripheral for to return me to reality, causing both the bishop and Lord Gregor to laugh. I pretended not to notice, and continued to stare off where Tomoyo would have been.
“Oh no! He’s been possessed! We need an exorcism!”
“I don’t do those anymore. Not after the incident…” the bishop’s eyes darkened, as if remembering some terrible horror that occurred.
“I got this” Lord Gregor summoned his hammer in a blinding flash of light. “By the Light! Cleanse this soul!” Lord Gregor went through a small routine of theatrics, dramatically doing nothing. “Darn, and I was so sure that was going to work”
The chairs began filling. Slowly at first, then at a quicker pace as people followed the leader. Nagisa Furukawa, the Fujibayashi twins and Lord Timothy joined our conversational group as well. Soon, though, the language barrier became too much of an inconvenience, as I led a sundering of the group, leaving Gregor, Timothy, Niko and Mr. Cuzner to their own devices, opting to speak with the friends I had cultivated while courting Tomoyo in Japan. The moon peeked over the horizon and the sun was offering only scars of light when we moved in to formation.
From the side, Uncle Ted, a locally renowned piano player, began the ceremonial chorus, dancing his appendages about a portable electric piano my father had purchased a few years ago sounding on the organ setting.
Her father, Sausuke-san, heralded her presence like the creeping dawn heralds the sunrise. Like a beautiful blossom, she stood, moon to her back; an aura of penumbral lunar radiance cast around her like a halo. Her vibrant silvery-gray hair cascaded around her petit frame like gently falling rain about a masterful statue. A small blue flower was held at the corner of her face, clinging near her ear, where it accented the deep ocean blue of her eyes.
Clad in a traditional white kimono adorned with intricate stitchings of cranes and flowers, she floated up the aisle as if the only thing keeping her from ascending infinitely was her father’s hand. After ushering her to the mark, Sakagami-san gave a respectful bow to his daughter and turned to me. I presented him with a deep, grateful bow, to which he returned before taking his place next to his wife.
The bishop cleared his throat softly. “We are gathered here today to celebrate the uniting of this respectable young lady and this rascal, Tomoyo Sakagami and Morgan Butler IV. If they would now present vows.”
My tuxedo should’ve been stained red. My heart full to bursting at that point. I hadn’t been so nervous to speak since my 2010 Acadec speech, and even that couldn’t compare. Composing myself, I offered my hand and locked eyes with her. Everything else was fading away. It didn’t matter. It couldn’t have in that moment. It was like standing in a forest clearing with naught but the shining light of the moon and the rhythmic dancing of fireflies, miles away from the world, miles away from the people, miles away from everything. All who was before me, all who could hear my voice was her.
“I’ve been searching for quite some time
For that special one who would be mine
Long I’ve tread on this road of life
Wondering if I wasn’t doing something right
But then in you came
And with you it all changed
You awoke this heart
Gave me a new start
But now its my turn
I’m going to show you now
I’ve never going to let you go
Forever I’m going to know
Forever between us I will feel that spark
Until the light fades out
Until the room grows dark
Until the moon shines down
Even after the years have painted their scorns on our days
I’ll still see the loving glow on your face
And like every Disney you see
My love for you will still shine free
For you I’d climb a mountain
For you I’d swim the seas
I’m asking you to by soul’s companion
And spend your life with me”
Not once did she allow herself to lose her visual grip, even as her eyes grew lustrous with tears. But at once it was too much. She looked down, closing her eyes tightly, shaking her head and donning an amused smile.
“Looks like we had the same idea” she stated as she returned her gaze to mine.
“Like the sun’s light on the moon, you have shone your light on me
You’ve lit up my life in a darkening sea
I don’t ever want to lose this light
Forever I want it in my life
It not for the sex and its not for the beauty
I never want to lose your unconditional loyalty
Like a light in the night I’ll never waver or doubt
That, to me, you’ll be coming home on an express route
And in return to you I’ll guarantee
Eternal love, support and fidelity
No matter the trial or tribulation
By you, I’ll ardently stand
And with mutual conviction
We’ll conquer all that seeks our end
In to the latter years of our life
As the sun sets forever
Despite life troubles and sadness
We’ll walk in to the horizon together”
I drew the same smile she had before she gave her vow.
“True Companion?” I asked
“No one but Cohn” All we could do was stand and stare at each other. She never ceases to be the person I met all those years ago. Rapier wit, assertive dominance, and a peculiar skill for romance.
“And now for the rings”
My little cousin Carolyn gave Tomoyo her band and Carolyn’s older brother, Brady gave me mine. The two grade-schoolers then ran back to their parents, clearly embarrassed beyond measurement. I was immediately given a highly sassy glare as Tomoyo stuck out her hand, demanding my hand. I raised my hand, preparing to place it on hers when she went to snatch it. I quickly pulled it back, combing my hair with my fingers and giving her look of grave satisfaction. She turned her hand in to a fist and belted a bone busting blow to my bicep and reoffered her palm. I submissively agreed, worrying for my ribs.
Her hands were smooth and soft; gracefully manipulating my fingers in to a deadly finger hold, prepared to sever my hand from my body should I try another one of my little zings. She slid the ring on peacefully, releasing me from her grasp, but I was not going to fall for her plan. I quickly turned my hand over and sojourned her right with mine. She raised her eyebrow mischievously, clearly ready with a backup plan. Again, she manipulated my inarticulate phalanges and instigated a thumb war. I gave a cute sigh, raised my eyebrow and looked at her with stern amusement at her audacity. She returned a victorious smile and allowed me control of her hand. I equipped her with the second half of the gold-woven band.
“Starcaller Tomoyo Sakagami, do you take this man, Moonweaver Morgan Butler IV, to be your husband for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, to love and to hold until death do you part?”
“I do”
“Skycaptain Morgan Butler IV, do you take this woman, Dread Falconer Tomoyo Sakagami, to be your wife for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, to love and to hold until death do you part?”
“I do”
Father Cuzner closed his book and looked expectantly at the two of us.
“Well, kiss her. What are you waiting for?”
Immediately I pulled the angel in to a deep embrace and pressed my lips on to hers. Only for a few seconds could I hear the applause. A thousand times before I had kissed her, but there was a novel quality of this kiss. Everything felt excitingly new. Special. Pure. The soft arms on my back, her fine hair titillating my forehead and eyelids, her slender form melting in a wonderful mutual embrace, her warm lips on mine. An angel had chosen me.
We parted enough to look at each other and traded warm expressions. Most of the seated attendees no longer were. We turned to face them, never losing the happiness on our faces as cameras flashed and people began to line up to shake hands and congratulate us.
After the swarm of people had passed and were now at work stacking up the chairs near the house to open up space for other activities. The moon now cast its approving gaze upon us from above the trees, joined by multitudes of hanging Maru Ball Japanese lanterns. The night passed quickly and in spurts. The dinner, around 8:00 was casual at best, already having given people the choice of eating at whatever point they chose. Still, we obliged to a dinner of family heads, honoring the tradition as best we could. Various activities occurred about the yard: Uncle Ted continued to play the piano, gladly rehearsing his vast repertoire for all who desired a jolly listen; a tossing of the Frisbee was now underway where the ceremony had taken place; dancing was abound at the front of the house; and Lord Radi was swindling everybody’s money after setting up an impromptu game of Texas Hold Em north east of the Frisbee game.
After the dinner Tomoyo and I changed in to semi-formal wear, prepared for physical activity and potential accidental spills, and proceeded to participate in the festivities. Well, except for Lord Radi’s monopoly on his victim’s wallets. This event was simply spectated.
“You know, we never finished that thumb war” Tomoyo looked my way.
“Promise not to break my finger?” I offered my hand.
“So long as you play fair” We stood up, understanding the severity of the situation. Atop the low-pitched roof of the house, we locked fists and began the ritual.
“1-2-3-4 I declare a thumb war! 5-6-7-8 TASTE THE FLAMES OF SULFURON!” Our declaration was simultaneous and ostentatiously bombastic. Instantly we delved in to the depths of a battle on a scale to rival the invasion of Troy. Though, instead of fighting for a woman, we fought for dominance in the realm of finger-related prowess. As we advanced back and forth, dancing about the roof, we had accumulated a small crowd of onlookers. In the blink of an eye, I was flung, spun and pinned to the ground under her weight. Tomoyo twisted my arm, freezing my thumb in regionalized pain. She immediately seized the opportunity and gripped my thumb like a vice. I leapt to my feet, spinning like a ballroom dancer and freed myself from both traps she had locked me in.
“Not bad, my beloved. But can you handle the LION’S BARRAGE!?” Her visage intensified as she began an intense thumb punches to which I quickly buckled beneath. Before she had even began, I was defeated. “362 of the 1000 attacks – an impressive feat”
“I will beat you one day”
“Not likely. I do have a heritage of powerful thumb warriors”
“But who says you’re immune to seductive tactics”
“I’d say it goes both ways”
Again we were in each others embrace.
“I love you, Tomoyo” Her eyes, blue as the sky, and twinkling with the same nebulous stars of the cosmos looked passionately in to mine. Her silvery gray hair, shining in the light of the moon, falling below her hips, caressed my embracing arms and her head rested beneath my chin.
Like the soft purr of a kitten she whispered, “I love you, too”
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